Bop to the Top ★

So our 20 time fair was a success! It was so great for me to be able to display my project to all of you guys by being able to be confident and talk to everyone with out freaking out! Just by doing that 20 time fair not only did it make me realize all of the progress I have made on this project, it made me feel really good about myself! Many people told me that they they would have never guessed that I had confidence issues! So that really made me feel good! 

This is a photo of me and my friend kayla at the 20 time fair! 

I have been working really hard this week to smile more at people and to not cross my arms so much. I have found that I cross my arms a lot so it makes people find me unapproachable so just by not crossing my arms, not only do I feel more confident in myself others approach me more. Also I found that many people think that I am just snobby if they don't know that I am shy because I don't address them. So I just wanted to say I am so sorry to anyone who thought that! Haha I hope no one thinks that but you never know.. 

Anyways these past few weeks have helped me a turmenduois amount and I hope that it continues to help me for the rest of my life!  

Gotta Go My Own Way

These past few weeks have had many challenges and also high points. So this last week I played in my first match. Even though I wasn't to nervous I still felt like I wasn't as confident as I should be. The thing I said the most was "I'm sorry!" because I thought I was losing the match for my other teammate. Then my teammate came up to me and told me I need to be more confident in my abilities and just believe in myself. And so I did. Even though we lost, once I was able to relax I was able to enjoy myself and I had a good time! I also had a panic attack last week in anatomy class when we were taking blood pressure and I almost passed out so yeah theirs that. I have been talking to someone about why I have confidence issues and they said that it is because I have a chemical that is released into my brain when I am nervous that causes my brain to go foggy and I can't think straight. That is why I don't talk in large group discussions or anything because i am so nervous that I can't talk right. This week I challenged myself to read a larger out loud in our small group for Antigone. This was pretty hard for me and even though I struggled with it I still got though it! So I guess that is one step towards gaining some confidence!
Even though I may not seem like I am making big strides in this project but just by doing this blog and opening up to you guys is a major part of this project. I usually am really quiet and hidden but by being out in the open this is a major step for me. So I hope that I can continue growing in this project and making smaller steps that result in one big one!
 I am starting to freak about this 20-time "Pitch" because I don't know what to include in my visual but if you guys have any ideas to let me know! Please come to our pitch next Tuesday!